Imposter Syndrome, the Inner Critic, and Managing People Smarter than You with Steve Schlafman

Were you thrust into a leadership position without a lot of training and preparation? Have you risen rapidly as a leader and find yourself a bit uncertain?

Or maybe you’re a founder making things up as you go, and finding yourself managing other incredible people.

Being a leader who has to learn on the job can be intimidating and scary. Imposter syndrome and its sibling, the inner critic, can leave you struggling to be your best. And all of this is only compounded when you have brilliant people on your team who are smarter or better than you at their job.  

That’s why we have VC turned leadership coach Steve Schlafman on to talk about how you can navigate all of this and thrive as a leader, even when you’re on your own to figure out this leadership thing.

Listen to our episode on overcoming imposter syndrome and your inner critic:

• Spotify​​​
• ​​​​Apple Podcasts​​​​
• ​​​​​Google Podcasts​​​​​​
• ​​​​​​Stitcher​​​​​​

Show Notes:

•  Some helpful links related to the topics we covered:
  • Conscious Leadership Group by Diana Chapman and Jim Dethmer
    • Unarguables: https://conscious.is/excercises-guides/speaking-unarguably
  • 68% of managers are afraid to communicate with their teams. Learn what you can do to be like the 32% that aren’t. 
  • How to embrace curiosity as a leader.
  • Shirzad Chamine - Inner critic: https://www.positiveintelligence.com/about/
• Books we discussed:
  • Non-Violent Communication by Marshall Rosenberg
    • OFNR: Observe - Feeling - Need - Request structure outlined here: https://drlwilson.com/ARTICLES/NONVIOLENT_COMMUNICATION.htm

Key actions for you to take today from the interview:

1. Be open and curious rather than closed and defensive: Overcome your imposter syndrome by embracing what you don’t know and look for opportunities to learn from others, even your own team. 
2. Question the stories about yourself: Ask yourself what stories run in your mind and if they’re helpful for you and your goals. 
3. Have self-acceptance and compassion: No one is harder on you than you. Recognize that, and look for opportunities to be less hard on your self, and compassionate when you have work to do. 
4. Make a list of your accomplishments: Build more self confidence and quiet the inner critic when they’re too loud, by listing out what you’ve accomplished to show yourself what you are capable of doing.   

Where to find and follow Steve:

• You can follow Steve on Twitter @schlaf and learn more about his coaching practice at www.schlaf.co